These difficult situations that we are faced with dealing with OCD, they can seem like an extremely HUGE deal in the moment. With OCD, these shrapnels of extreme discomfort can be hitting our brain constantly, images, urges, intrusive thoughts, wanting us to fix something, avoid something, or maybe to get it “just right.” We want to keep enjoying our lives as much as possible. We can have confidence that things usually end up okay, but we obviously never know “for sure.” There are thousands of areas that our OCD doesn’t focus on, we still swim out daily into these gray areas of life, we are still stepping out in faith, and hoping for the best.
We want to live our lives as ongoing exposure. We show our brain and body that we can push forward without chasing after this thing that we will never catch. This too usually passes. It doesn’t mean it won’t be trying to torment 4 seconds later, however we want to remind ourselves that we “forgot” about countless situations that felt like our life depended on it in that moment. This too will probably pass. We know that more peace is found when we face it head on.
If OCD were a football field, it would try to hold us in the end zones. It’s wanting us to review or ruminate on the past, and then often urging us to fix or prevent bad things in the future. If our life is the game, and it’s played on the field, then we are better off on the field attempting to embrace the present with all its bumps and bruises, over and over. No matter how dark, difficult, or unfair it may be, we do ourselves a huge disservice if we continue to let this demon pin us down in the end zones. On this field of life, we deserve to play if we choose, just as others do.
If we can remind ourselves that no matter how genuine, or real, or “different”, this current situation feels, we have had thousands of other situations that tried to make us feel the same Damn way. If I can let the flames be there, even if it’s just for 3 seconds, without rituals or avoidance, it’s something. It’s in the right direction. Let’s take that 3 seconds and build on it. Let’s turn that into decades of living our life while this monster fades into the background. Remember, countless times, we have forgot. Spend time in areas that you care about. Let us try to show ourselves and others kindness, 20 minutes at a time. 🙂
“For our salvation is for everyone.” Judas Priest – Rising from Ruins